heylo :D

TODAY IM BETTER :)
HEHEH enjoying life with friends.
The world is so big smths it doesnt really just revolve around a single soul :D
Recently watched iron man 2 and Back up plan too!
THEY ALL ALL SO HOT MAKES ME GO MELTS.
heeeeeehaarrrrrrrrr :D
Back up plan damn aww should watch with your bf ^^
Hehehheh I like my frens :)
funnyfunny,
wheeheehee I shall jian fei.
LOL, :D
All my exams half bucket water but ohwells ,mye only and i never really put in my best yet :X still quite slack.
So i shall JY MAN XD
blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa,
worried! ABT THIS SUNDAY OMG i shall go practice OMG SCARED )):
HEE heeeeeeeeee

Do you even remember?
I wanna show it to you.

I fucking hate myself for always losing it.
stomach so fucking pain like some shit
Fuck man, )))))))))))))))))))))))):
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))):
Zzzzzzzzz why are u torturing me like that,
smths im really curious to know what will happen if i die.
But i dont think anyone would even give a fucking shit abt it.
I dont even think my friends would cry for me or whatever shit la.
Zzzzzzz fuck man i hate studying i hate everything i hate myself why cant i be better and strong or what so ever shit i hate ppl who break their promises
I hate everything in this stupid world i hope smth will happen to me and i die or smthing since i dont have any courage.
I really cannot take it anymore I HOPE I DIE NOW.
Ya lor, if the world didnt suck we would all fall off.
argh im so bitchy and everything thats why i suck and no one likes me and wtf man
i have attitude problems and stuff yayaya wdv!!!!!!
only know how to cry and cry and cry but nothing is going to change for you dear bitch
so just go die
fucking hell.
bitch u just used a f load of vuglarity -.-

Haissssssssss i am saddddddddd lololol.
complicated :)
Argh~
I hope you are proud of everything you did.
THANKS ALOT, you made my life so much better,
Changed everything for me.
Seriously i must try.
GO EUGENIA.
damn but i was never good at suceeding.

hais, and i have a pimple on my back :P

Hey,
I just read a friend's blog.
very touching and sad that post.
Hmm i think dogs are very endearing creatures,
when no one are there, your family or your frens,
Your pet dog will be there.
Thats why i like dogs haha
Hmm,
Im super sucky hahah, my muscles all still hurts :<
I shall go study later :) i dont like the hot weatherrrrrrrrr!
hahahha sucks, these few days always alone at home one.
Lol, used to be alone alr.
How will u feel if.
all your cftaybyb
when they're not even close.
I feel nothing alr, dead.
So its okay,
lol.
Issues.

Emptyness

Shall blog tmr, lol..
Desktop spoiled.
Haha feel very terrible.
not that motivated yet :/
Im a sucky fren, ):
Food is my best fren.

Hello :))))
I just woke up! :)
Now i eating noodles damnnice :D but i very full! :D
But of cource im still going to finish eating it.
These few days keep eating sleep eating sleep watch tv play comp blablaboring life but ohwells :D
Not in the mood and very lazzy go out so i feel abit bad smths always pangseh my frens.
Todayyyyyyy chinese oral, not very good hahaha.
Aft that go tamp eat with the guys (see ah i eat )
Then go huat house slack awhile, should have gone home change but lazy~
Then later go tamp wanna watch the Monga.
Nc 16! some of us manage sneak in i guess?
Hahahah, but some of us cant cause school uniform! ):
i kinda wanna watch the movie with..
LOL, but nevermind so me and huat go eat mcflurry ftw,
Then some of us went to his house agnnnnn
wasnt that bad
watch phobia 2 quite okay ;)
The last fift(omg i suddenly forget how spell fifth) eh okremmber -.-
story was quite hilarious.
Then watch alr then play taiti,
quite fun haha!
Then the guys came huat house so i went home as they were gonna play ball :D
feel so moved today i had smilies wanna cry hahahahah!

strangers are better.

At this stage, i rather be strangers.
Haha
eh i guan xin you lah
lol, hais.
)))))))))))))))))):
What more can i want?
you dont even care ):
promises are nothing then
You will never understand,
i hope u look me in the eyes and stab me
haha nights, i wanna be a superhero ):
):
):
Hais.
zzzzzzz
life is meaningless :D
everybody got somebody and i have nobody
hahahaha
lol, my fault kay.
but what regret can do? nth,
not fair, i want time to go back.
lol, u dont seem to get smths girls do things to make
u jealous, but its not worth it, im so misunderstood.
i hate myself :D

sorry abt the negative post yesterday :/
Guess im feeling better.
Not feeling better also no point right :)
haha, okay the day was not bad.
I kinda ok with them
tessa and weishan and carolyn quite nice
I like them alot.
haha, looking forward to what we practised ^^ quite hilarious.
Excited, but of cause mid years comes first.
Just now taking the taxi i wondered what impact would it have on the human body if someone suddenly ipens the door and jumps out. :O all the oncoming cars how?
haha weird thought omg.
hais, sad but not able to do anything,
But i really want to, really ):
))):
)':
but there's nth i can do.

i can hear the bells; but i seriously cant.
think of me, think of me falling when u say goodbye.
I was trying to fly but i couldnt find wings
then u came along, and changed everything.
You lift my feet off the ground spin me around you made me crazier crazier

I dont wanna talk about it
It makes me wanna cry
Every time I pour out my emotions
I feel emptier inside
I don't know how to play it like I'm not in love with you,
But I'll try Even though I do...still
Miss you
Just like the air that I breathe
I need you
With me
I'm not gonna lie
I cant imagine my life
With out you but I
Suppose I will survive...
I'm not gonna play myself
Every time my cell rings
Checkin for your name
I promise that
I'll never tell You how I feel
And I know that you dont feel the same
Did you think that you could hurt me so
I just gotta let you go
Everytime I find myself alone
ooooh I...
Miss you
Just like the air that I breathe
I need you
With me
I'm not gonna lie
I cant imagine my life
With out you but I
Suppose I will survive...
Dont try to explain
Why your love's changed
Boy you really broke my heart this time
I wont let it take away my pride
or Who I have inside
Boy I'm torn between
every thing how could
I feel nothing
I woulda done anything
If it would mean
I could make you love me
You're the one I need
But you still believe
We can never be...
And I miss you
More than the air that
I breathe
I need you
With me
I'm not gonna lie
And I can't imagine myself
Without you but
I suppose I will survive
I'll be fine, dont worry about me
I'll be okay

till u i was nothing but lonely nights now all are left are sad goodbyes

I thought i was alright until just now.
Last time i didnt like to be alone yet now i found it actually quite normal alr.
Walked down hill alone,
all quiet.
I think alot wanted to exploit all my emotions here but i guess its not that worth it.
I feel very alone
i've changed if you remembered knowing me when i was sec 2.
Everything around was so free then, didnt have to worry abt anything.
Love can make u feel like the happiest thing in the world yet at the same time
it can also make u feel the exact opposite.
I have always been the onlooker not really experiencing these type of things myself.
Didnt think it was worth it.
Didnt really give a damn abt it.
Just wanted to enjoy life with my frens.
Yet now, i am no longer who i used to be.
People who doesnt know me
might think i am very cheerful and stuff
but i dont think so. not anymore.
I am not as innocent, i didnt want to grow up.
I didnt have a choice, why must reality be so cruel?
Why do i always screw up everything,
Last year was hectic,
Many stuffs happened.
It was the first time smone made me felt this way, didnt want to try anything abt it though.
I dont understand, i thought i was different.
Many ppl warned me what i was getting into
I didnt have a choice did i?
I make wrong decisions, but nobody actually gave me a chance.
I was just trying to be nice. I dont see what i did wrong.
It was just my first time why dont u guys understand nor see it?
I didnt want to be who i am now.
I didnt want it,
I did try my very best to change.
With new frens and all.
It just showed me how caught up i was in my perfect world and everything.
Indeed, the world is far from perfect,
circumstances, i had to grow up, had to be more mature,
I know i dont fit into this clique because i am different.
I am very crazy, retarded and tomboyish type of person.
I used to laugh about nothing, but now im plain boring.
someone showed me what i was worth, but now im worthless of cause.
someone doubted me, but i dont think i was that kind of person.
Are u that kind of person. someone whom everybody says u were.
But i believed u.
but why u doubt me because u were afraid im like you?
Someone made the year feel better for me of cause.
But within the past few hours i realised another thing
I have never mattered, i guess i was just another toy who looked cute.
Im a toy, an interesting toy that u found interesting at the beginning.
You talked to me.
I gave u chances but u didnt give me.
Why are u so cruel and didnt give me time,
You never had the courage to clarify, until the end.
But you are not the beginner at this, i was.
But i know this world is unfair.
didnt think you would be the one who would drive me into the corner.
You were the last one i thought who will do this.
But i shallnt harp abt it anymore. I have never felt good enough,
didnt have confidence, feel far than inferior.
Right now though, the world may seem crowded.
around me and anything.
But i know that nothing is going to change, nth is going to come,nth is going get restarted
Tanying and all has their own frens and things will never be the same.
CCA ended and all my frens are all concentrated with their studies.
I am here but i feel so left out
so left out.
It'll never be the same.
I'll never be the same.
If only i have the power to restart or even have the confidence to just end it all.
I find everything meaningless now.
I have the clique.
But im only close to her.
And she will not be there for me all the time its not her job.
I really feel alone.
Im so upset but who cares right?
fucking retarded and caught up in this mess i hate myself to the core
i hope the rain would drown me or hopefully just by surprise smth comes and end it all since i dont
have that amount of courage.
sorry.
going school, i hope everything around me dissapears.
having a headache.
But obviously u will never know how i feel because u dont even know me.
u said u clarified but if u actually think carefully,
u gave me hope and then crushed it
u didnt exactly clarifyed it to the core
u told her u regretted what you were, if u had the chance u wanna change that.
i also right? but no one is going to give us the chance.
right now u just make me doubt u endlessly
flamboyant.
sorry
sorry i know i suck at keeping my emotions close
but this time i think this is good enough