Empty

Everytime i feel sad or what, i'll just come to this dead blog..
I dunno, i have never felt so sad before.
Maybe i shall private this blog soon.
I feel so lost.
Its all my fault anyway.
I have always took things for granted.
If only time can be turned.
I'll do anything.
I dont mind giving up anything.
But now i know, studies are the most important.
So right now, in my life, the most happiest thing i can do is just to study only.
Why did everything pass so fast.
Yet everything is still vivid.
I really did try, maybe i didnt try harder enough?
Or my character is really that sucky.
Everytime smth happens u will be here.
Now you are not even here when i just want a there.
everything can make me cry but this makes me feel like dying
I must be brave. No breakdowns in school or at home i do not allow myself to.
But i cant. But its okay.
I really wish that i can sleep forever and fade.
I will be brave afterall if i do smth really stupid my parents will be the ones who suffer.
What did u tell me when i was sec 3 i still could remember. we werent even that close.
So right now i think being strangers are actually better.
But i cant.
Why must things be like this.
So sorry.
Why couldnt i tell?
I am really stupid
but I dont deserve any pity.
sorry...
Am i a replacement?
8 more months.
This time of last year u said i was cute.
stupid msn history.
But why must i study hard.
I alr have no goals or motivation.
No. mood. to. do. anything.
But i must, yea yea i know. haha
Music is very nice.
But some genres just makes me..
I'll try my best to be a dead person.
Cause dead person has no feelings right.
Or i'll zoom all the way outside planet earth and see
that im not even a dot. so my emotions are worth nothing just like me.
There are those who are in much worser situations.
I still have mouth nose eyes and ears.

Maybe i should go be a christian haha heard that its actually good..
my ochey very pain, but thanks for pinching me awake.lol.

Cause i dont wanna know if its the last time.
Please dont say if its a so.
Tell my heart is not goodbye.
And do this one thing for me.
Make up some stupid story now.
Its alright, keep the truth and tell me lies.

I'll put his picture down and maybe get some sleep tonight.
He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar.
The onlything that keeps me wishing on a wishing star.
The only one who's got enough me to break my heart.
He's the song in the car. I keep singing only why i do.
He looks at me i fake a smile so he wont see (: